Introduction to Danii


I’m Danii & these are my thoughts.  Well, some of them, at least the semi filtered ones that are too raw for my facebook friends, and okay for my Instagram followers. I decided to create a blog because I literally have a million thoughts that run across my mind on a daily basis.  I write a lot, usually in an old notebook, or in the notes of my Iphone 7.  =) I decided, it would be cool to get some input along the way.

So,”Dear Danii” was derived from throwback twitter name, lol.  I used to write a lot about my thoughts on there, it was so bad, it was almost like a diary to myself  about my life.  This will be similar.

About Danii

Birth name is Danielle.  Born and raised in a small town in Louisiana.  I’m 28. I have TWO little boys aged 7 & 2 as a product from my previous marriage. I’m single and liking it.  I like to read, write, think and eat  =) but most importantly spend time with my loved ones! I’m very easy to please, sometimes it’s a downfall, but I’m working on that.

This blog will be simply about my journey as a single woman. Finding myself as a woman, mother and eventually someone’s mate.  This blog won’t always be about me, but i’ll post some open ended questions so you can interact with me, because I love that! You’ll gain insight into how I think, and why I think the way that I do. Stop by  my blog often and Like, Share & comment. & I hope you enjoy.


I hope you enjoy.




Shit i learned in my twenties

As I am approaching year 30.  I look over my life and think about all the things i have learned.  i literally have no regrets, because at the end of the day God knows best.  Every single moment is preordained all i’m doing is going with the flow.  To the young girls in their twenties, maybe i can save yall from some heartache…so here goes.

Year 20- Make sure you live your life, don’t become tied down to someone who won’t allow you to be your BEST self.  HAVE FUNNNN!!!  This is a year for self discovery and fun.

Year 21- Before you have kids with someone, make sure they will be the person who would be mature enough to coparent with IF yall don’t work out, also make sure that person will be a man who will be present in their kids life without force.

Year 22- Make sure you keep your friends close, do not let anyone get in between that.  A major part of  a healthy relationship/ marriage, is healthy + respectful friendships outside of that relationship.

Year 23- You cannot beat on a door and turn it into a wall.  If you meet a person and they have ugly ways, a wedding ring, baby or anything else won’t change it.  either be willing to accept the person as is, or move on.

Year 24-  It’s okay if a relationship doesn’t work out. don’t force friendships, relationships, ponytails, just don’t do it.

Year 25- What you allow is what will continue.  Trust your heart and follow it. Love wins always, whether that be self-love or not.

Year 26- It’s okay to get an eraser and start all over again. Your life is a canvas, if something doesn’t come out the way you like it, flip the pencil over erase and draw that shit again.

Year 27- Family will stick by your side even when you’ve forsaken them! Stay true to those who have always been true to you, don’t take them for granted.

Year 28- Self care is the best care. learn to fall in love with yourself, and everyone else will too.

Year 29- Leaving a legacy is beyond important.  Stop waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel, and light that bitch up yourself.




A letter to my black sons…


Your melanin.

Your peanut butter brown skin, and your golden brown skin that you are IN..


May be the reason why you will be hated

By people you don’t know.

For reasons that you may never understand.

You will have to work twice as hard as some of your peers to get positions that you are overqualified for

Don’t let it deter you.

Be proud of who you are + be proud of where you came from.

Keep your head up and work hard for what you want

That way, no one can say it was given to you, it’ll be earned.

Your skin, is the skin of your ancestors who fought so hard

So that you would be able to step foot in doors that they could not.

Your skin is the skin of your ancestors who were beaten so that you would be given a chance to read this letter.

Those beatings that they endured,

That is what makes your skin tough

You can get through anything.

Your hands are those from the lineage of men and women who picked cotton

not because they wanted to

but because they had to,

& Because of them.

Those hands that you have, will never have to do anything of the sort.

Use them to change the world.

Your feet are from those feet that were blistered as they had to walk barefoot

Use them to walk the path of righteousness.

Young Kings, life will not be easy for you,

But it will never be as hard as your ancestors had it.

Give praise to the highest for placing you in a time, where our freedom isn’t as free as the rest, but it’s what we have, so we have to work with it.

In school “Black History” will teach you just enough

But you need to learn more.

Yes, We WERE slaves, BUT, we were also, kings + queens, We were and still are business men + women

We were smart + logical

We were hardworking, we were not lazy.

We were strong..some of the strongest people you’d never know!

Because of them..

The ceiling is GLASS,

It is not made of stone as many would want you to think..

Shatter that ceiling,

and shoot for the moon,

Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.

Starting right where you are 

Today we are 19 days into the new year. Research has shown that 80% of New Years Resolutions fail by February, so that means technically we have 12 more days left right? Wrong! What they didn’t tell you is that, you don’t fail unless you don’t try again. So what if you quit seven days into the New Year, it doesn’t make you a quitter if you start again five days later. I have that really bad, I am an excellent starter, but when it comes to finishing sometimes I’m not the best. I have made it my duty to make this year a year of finishing everything that I start + if I get side tracked, make it no issue to pick back up and try again! Nothing is wrong with that. It’s life. As long as you start right where you are, then you are NOT a quitter. In 2018 Keep it simple:1. Stop letting abandoned dreams stay abandoned, pick back up and start OVER again, find a different route in doing it, make your plans more detailed, whatever the case, get it done.

2. Try your hardest to avoid distractions. (Distractions, can be people or things that keep you away from achieving your goals) Everyone can’t go where God is trying to take you.

3. Remember why you started + why you can’t quit. (I can’t let my kids think that quitting is okay)

4. Keep Going. (everything you do brings you closer to where you are supposed to be, doing what you are supposed to be doing)


I think before I became a single woman with kids, I believed that women should always have their kids. I won’t lie, moms made the shit look easy. I felt like Mothers should always want to be around their kids, always be up for activities, always have a smile on their face. I’ve come to realize that I can’t always do that! I feel that this doesn’t make me a bad mother, or even a bad person. It makes me a person who has come to the realization that as human beings we need breaks. We need to be alone to recharge sometimes. On the days that I don’t have my kids you can find me at home in seclusion with my kindle app in hand, or expressing my thoughts with pen and paper. I feel as women, society wants us to fit this mold. + we can fit into this mold believe me. However, in order to be that kind, nurturing, loving, supporting person that you’d like us to be. We need “alone time” makes us, our Best Self! We need self teaches us to be aware of the world around us. When I go on dates alone, I am always People watching. I love to see how other people interact. I love to see love unfold unedited. No Instagram filters, just raw, in the moment love. Those moments teach me that Love outside the Gram is still real and relevant! + We need to sleep alone sometimes, stretching across our beds solo dolo. Not worrying about looking pretty when we wake up. I feel when you learn to be alone, you see that being a single woman isn’t so bad.
As a single woman, I have needs + there are times when I hear a song, and I imagine my future partner and I in the lyrics + that makes me want to rush, what is on its way. Then there are other times when I get it. In order to deal with a woman like me, God has to perfect him. I’m okay with that. There are so many times when people feel alone in a house full of people, or alone in a marriage, and I feel that bc I’ve felt that before. Honesty, sometimes I still do that’s when we have to realize that feelings are all about perspective and how we look at things. If we look at being alone as being lonely, then we will accept that’s what it is. But if we look at being alone as being present in our very own moment , then that’s what it will be!
Love & Light

Keep it Real

Dear Danii,

I talk about this often but DATING these days. TRAGIC. About two years ago, I was talking to this guy (He was completely not my type might i add, but i gave it a try) Anyways, it didn’t work out, not even sure if I remember why, it could have been my inconsistency, or it could have been his..that’s neither here nor there.  Long story short, I added him on IG a few days ago, and turns out homie just recently got engaged.  (Ok, congrats to him right?) So, i look at the link with their love story & I see that homie has been with this girl since High school! Now, I’m not the greatest at math, but something ain’t adding up? We’ve been out of high school 10+ years, so something isn’t right. He’d often want to take me on dates, and invite me to his home, yet he had been in a relationship with this girl all these years? So either he was trying to make me his side chic, or maybe he was single and she portrayed as if they were still together..idk what the case is, & at this point i haven’t talked to him in so long that I honestly don’t care if he was trying to play me as a side chic or not,  it’s just strange.  So, I go and take a look on her page and OF COURSE she’s head over heels in love, even in the write up of their engagement, she says they eat dinner every night? lol that’s comical.  Comical because he was trying to cook for me often. Before you ask, I’ll never expose him, that ain’t my job, and honestly it isn’t even in me to do that, i DO NOT EXPOSE ,so don’t ask me who he is.  Maybe he’s changed for the better, I hope so.

The point of  all of this is, As women, we tend to exaggerate our relationships.. i wouldn’t do it now, in fact i think i’d keep my relationship sacred for my own personal reasons, but do yall post these things to make yall feel better or yall just don’t know he’s cheating, or yall don’t care? I think, I can’t praise a man that I KNOW is doing me wrong.  To the men (women cheat too, i know, but i’m talking about yall), do yall know how embarrassing cheating is & do yall understand why we don’t trust you and hate your guts after the fact? We have to deal with knowing the other woman has had a piece of our man, and then we have to not “look” as hurt as we feel in the process, put on a front so that the “other woman” won’t get any satisfaction out of knowing just how hurt we are.  It’s hard but we deal, until we can’t anymore.  & not to mention that Some women find joy in hurting the woman, even when they knew what they signed up for.  That aint cool.  I feel like the best thing that a cheating man could do is to be honest with both parties, either they’ll deal or they won’t..but even if that woman does decide to “deal” understand the risk that you are taking. Every woman will not hold your secrets!

Anyways, i’m single so for now, so I don’t have “Man” problems, I do what I want when I want to , and sometimes that involves going home by myself in peace and snuggling up with a good eBook (my eBook ,The Year  is available for pre-order today **Shameless plug)  Until I find him, i’ll continue to be observant of how non chalant some people take relationships these days, and use that info for when I decide to settle down again. I’m not cynical of  real love, i do know that it exists.  I’m not afraid of it, just afraid of falling for what’s not REAL..ya know, the devil hears our prayers too, sometimes what you think you want will come dressed up exactly how you’d expect it to look but only sent from satan himself.  Be cautious and patient.





Contrary to others beliefs strong as you want to be, you are also human.  I know i am, feelings get hurt, i cry, i yell, sometimes, i say VERY mean things when angry, I’m defensive ..this list could go on & on. However, I’m also a praying woman, a good friend, a great mother, a motivator & that list could go on as well. People always try to tell you how YOU should feel..what you SHOULD say, how you should react! The reality is half of those people Aren’t in your shoes & couldn’t walk a day in them if they tried. Although, it’s foolish to ALWAYS react with rage, but if you are constantly being tried, it’s obvious that eventually you will react. People expect you to ALWAYS be strong & to be quiet all of the time or always expect you to be the bigger person. It’s not possible. Or i hate when they say “You’re better than that” first of all, No I’m not! Lol & just because we’re good people we don’t have to always be quiet or above calling people out on their shit! Sometimes you have to learn when to be quiet and let God handle your battles BUT sometimes, you have to let them know you ain’t no push over! I feel as though the “correct” reaction is based on perspective, the way you handle things may work for you, As for me, this is MY life, these were my experiences, my feelings i can speak or write about what i please and not feel guilty bc that is my choice and this works for me. Others may not understand it or agree & honestly it’s not for them to understand or agree with. If it makes me feel better for that moment then I’m doing it. I owe loyalty to no one who is not loyal to me. You never know what’s going on in a persons mind Let them vent sometimes until you see that they’re out of control with the venting, & then thats okay to try to stop them if you are genuinely trying to help. But sometimes, You don’t even have to understand just be quiet and let them fight their battle the beSt way they know how! One thing about me, When necessary, I will always speak my mind when my hand is forced & ain’t no stopping that! The message behind this is…Don’t let nobody tell you to shut up but do know that there is a time and a place for everything to be said! It helps to think before your react. Logically speaking, if you put something in the microwave with a lid closed tightly and don’t let it vent what would happen? It would explode! I’m not about to explode or have a breakdown to appease anyone! If i said out loud everything that i kept to myself A lot of feelings would be hurt, but i keep it to myself..Cuz I don’t do this to hurt anyone else.. i do this to heal myself. 

Year 29

Woke up this morning feeling extra grateful! I’m 29 years young! Without knowing it 28 became the year of awareness for me! I️ became aware and I️ owned up to the woman that I️ DID NOT wanna be, I️ saw my faults and took complete responsibility for them. Year 28, I️ dabbled in a lot. I️ failed a lot behind closed doors, and succeeded behind them too! Although I️ am an open book, I️ do still keep a lot to myself cuz everything ain’t y’all Business lol! Of all the things I’m proud of Dear Danii was born again and revamped and I️ still couldn’t be more proud of myself for that (& the things that will come from it). I’ve learned gratitude more than ever this year. Gratitude! Gratitude for the what is, and the what’s to come! Now that I’ve learned awareness Year 29 will be all about ACTION. I️ have a lot of stuff on my vision board that has to be completed by year 30, & if I️ can’t finish em all then year 30 will have to be about Acceptance! I’ve learned that you can’t rush everything. Anyways here’s to year TWENTY-fiNE (29) & getting shit done!